See, that's what I would of had as the Daily News headline today. Alarming because the Eagles displayed almost no offensive ability as they (just barely) backed into a win yesterday and alarming because Lincoln Financial Field's alarm system went off during the fourth quarter. Alarming also because the tens of thousands of fans at the game treated the whooping alarm as if it belonged to some souped-up Camaro down the street and got all confused, then annoyed, then just ignored it. But, hey, it's okay that it was ignored (even by the players and officials for a play or two) because it was a false alarm, see. Never mind that nobody knew it was a false alarm at the time. This was pretty much as close as they would come to having a fire drill at a game, and they failed. What we found out yesterday was that the Eagles fans' first response to an emergency warning alarm would be indifference. That's kind of scary.
Speaking of Eagles failures, Saturday afternoon was the Eagles Kids Club Halloween Party at the Linc and it was L-A-M-E. They charge you ten bucks per kid to join the club, then they make you pay for parking (another ten bucks) at the party. And what did the party consist of? Lines. Lots and lots of lines. Lines to collect candy from the cheerleaders, lines to go on the bouncy rides, lines to paint pumpkins, lines to... well, that's it, because, other than a haunted house that looked like it was set up by sixth-graders, all the party was was bouncy rides, pumpkin painting, and candy handed out by cheerleaders (overdressed cheerleaders). All this line-waiting took place on a freezing and wet concourse that somehow turned even the slightest breeze into a category 5 wind gust. Oh, they also let you walk on the sideline of the field, - woo hoo!
Making the event even more fun was the way you had to sign a liability release form before your kid went on a ride - a separate form for each and every ride. After waiting in line for a half-hour to go on the ride. Nothing says fun like legal documents! And even though the "party" took place at noon, the only lunches you could get were the from the concession stands that were selling hot dogs and pretzels at their usually gameday prices (and just like at the games they checked bags for contraband food at the gates). Luckily, "Twistee," the Auntie Anne mascot (who was much scarier than anything in the haunted house) was giving out coupons for free pretzels - "offer good at Auntie Anne's stores in Eagles Country! NOT VALID AT STADIUM" (emphasis theirs). Lame, people, L-A-M-E lame.
You can just imagine how excited I am about the upcoming Kids Club Movie Night.
overdressed cheerleaders. what is the world coming to.
Posted by: albert | 2005.10.25 at 09:08 AM
Sorry about your coupon experience at the Linc. Drop me a line if you have any trouble using it at our stores in "Eagles Country." I can also provide you with an updated image of Twistee if you like. The image that you found online is a little dated and does not convey the true horror that you encountered. Excellent shout out to Tupelo in your headline BTW. Did you happen to catch Son Volt at the Troc? Good show, but Farrar was much better when he was backed by the Bouquist boys.
Posted by: Ryan Olah | 2005.10.27 at 05:26 PM